i don't know how to describe it
saya terlalu sedih
i cannot control myself anymore
i am totally lost
seriously
i feel like giving everything up right now
i want to go away
how i wish i never been here in the first place
enough with lying my own feeling
enough with all things that i pretended it to be okay
enough with all the fake smiles
enough with i don't mind situation
enough with everything
Allah, forgive me
saya rasa sangat down
i am not excel in my study
not even have skills
even for the paper that others can score, i failed to score
even for paper that people say easy, it is hard for me
even for things that people can do it easily, it takes lot of effort for me to do it
how i wish i am not a left-handed
how i wish i am as good as others
how i wish i weren't me
ya Allah,
maafkan saya
jadikan saya lebih tabah
agar saya gembira menjadi saya
andai ini yang terbaik bagi saya
jadikan saya redha dengannya
jangan jauhkan rahmatMu dari saya
dan bimbinglah saya menuju redhaMu
permudahkan urusan saya di dunia dan akhirat
perkenankan
ya Allah
hati yang rapuh.......
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