Monday, February 28, 2011

# 19

back in primary school
some of the students call me ana
i don't know why they called me ana in the first place

then people just called me farhanah or farhana
then during my fourth former in secondary school
some of the friends called me paa
simply because
my face looks like one of their friend whom the name is farah (nick paah)

lots of people having the name that sounds similar
the continue on calling me paa

my mum and dad called me kakak sometimes
or even cik mek
my siblings called me angah/che ngah

before i forget
some of my patients do called me fara or farah
idk y
it's kind of weird actually
but then
i'm ok with it


Tuesday, February 22, 2011

# 13

to whom it may concern

i don't know why you did that to me
frankly speaking
i never knew if i done you wrong
i never thought of something bad upon you
and i thought you are unique
i respected you a lot before this
after what had happen between us
i feel so sad
i never thought that you can do this to me
for the first time you did it
i still can stand myself from thinking something bad
when it come to the second time
i am shocked
and even i am hurt
i still telling myself not to hate you
and the third incidence really makes it inevitable
yes you!
the hatred is inevitable
i really wanted to know so badly why did you do this to me
where did i go wrong?
where did i do wrong?
you tell me
my respect to you also fade as these incidence happen
how i wish i never see you in the first place
how i wish that person was there in the first place
how i wish i didn't cry in the first place
how i wish i can bear the pain myself in the first place
so that the first incidence never happen in the first place
so that i still can show some respect to you
so that i am neutral with you
so that i am not hating you this much
i am sorry for hating you
i am merely a human being
i have feelings and emotions
and your actions are way too mean for a very-pampered-21-years-old-me
sorry again
how i wish i can forgive and forget things

Monday, February 21, 2011

# 12

blog is a medium

and i made one for me to write
to express what i think
to say what i want
to ease my cramp mind

its a meditation for me (kind of la)

Saturday, February 19, 2011


sometimes when i sit back and think
i kind of feel that it's quite tough to face these kind of things

adakah dental students u lain juga begini??
i mean do they always got lots of papers in a day continuously?
do this thing actually help us in managing our stress in working time later on?

this mid semester exam was the most horror exam experience
what do you expect me to say
it starts with community dentistry and behavioural science and oral health
ok la tu
the exams was before mid sem break
boleh tahan lagi
but after the break
it was like dilanda garuda
on the first day- monday
4 subjects (conservative dentistry, prosthodontics, orthodontics and paediatric dentistry)
the second day- tuesday
6 subjects (oral pathology oral medicine, diagnostic imaging, oral maxillofacial surgery, periodontology, general surgery and general medicine)
the so called last day- wednesday
5 papers (oral maxillofacial surgery, periodontology, diagnostic imaging, orthodontics and paediatric dentistry)
and the week after- wednesday
the last paper for real oral pathology oral medicine

sometimes rasa cam tak mampu je
plus dengan kemalasan
tambah dengan tiredness
rasa cam dah nak tersepuk kat lantai
if others can do
why can't i do the same?

ya Allah
berilah ketabahan dan kesabaran untuk berdepan dengan ujian dunia ini

hidup dan matikan saya dalam iman



kalau bukak yahoomail je mesti rasa cam nak marah
rasa cam nak maki-maki
sebab aku mmg la terlalu amat sgt benci email dr yahoogroup pandan
afaik kita semua ni dak dental and medical
tak boleh ke nak berfikir ngan lebih baik
kalau tak boleh, takde faedah la Allah bagi kite akal fikiran
dulu isu mesin basuh
sorry to say
tp sengal
korang hanya memenuhkan inbox org ramai ngan benda2 yg tak penting
pastu skang ni isu email address pun
pakat nak menyalak, terpekik, terlolong
kan senang kalau just mintak balik kat students email terbaru yg lebih professional
tak payah mcm org gila nak marah2 nak emo2 kat email tu
malulah sikit
you are a so called professional
so act like one
ni tak
buat penuh inbox org je dgn benda2 tak penting gitu
buat kitorg gelak terbahak2 pecah perut je dengan statement2 pelik tu
sejak aku da nak habis first year ag aku mintak group pandan add email baru aku
sampai untuk onepandanusim punya group pun mau gek letak email aku yang lama
pastu histeria la sbb student guna email tak professional la itu la ini la
pastu cakap benda tak masuk akal padahal dia tu yg in the first place memang salah
memang la
bikin panas je semua ni
patutnya moderator kena la lebih peka ngan semua ni
ni tak
cakap berdegar2
tp habuk pun tarak

k la
sebelum aku bertambah emo
baik aku blah

# 10

songs that like to be listen when i'm (y it must be songs???tak paham la)

happy: maybe i just smile all day long kot... idk
sad: anything that's make me realize how lucky i am for being granted with lots of thing that i am not eligible for
bored: anything that can be heard
hyped: something that are full of energy
mad: ntah.. ngamuk kot.. or just go somewhere and treat people...

Friday, February 18, 2011

# 9

i'm happy because i manage to redo class IV composite restoration
i never thought of getting to do class IV in one visit
but Alhamdulillah
all praises to Allah
He ease my way
and even i'm kind of dissatisfy of the outcome
as long as the patient is happy and satisfy with it
i'm kinda ok...

tq Allah for the good day :)

Thursday, February 17, 2011

# 8

-nak siapkan e&d patient cons
-nak siapkan denture design+special tray
-nak buat wire bending ortho kot

-nak buat tx cons tanpa perlu fikir e&d yang tak habis-habis
-nak panggil patient untuk ambik secondary impression
-nak kena hantar functional appliance bulan depan :(

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

mimpi, ilusi atau psikologi???

i kind of tak faham what is happening to myself
i tell you what
it happen again
the pain
and i don't get it
what is happening to me
am i being too mengada so that the feeling of pain is there
or it just nothing
i really am confuse
camne ek y'all???

# 7

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

ya Allah
terkadang saya alpa
terkadang saya leka
hingga saya lupa
tanggungjawab saya
sebagai hamba

bahkan bukan terkadang
hampir setiap masa saya terlupa
lalu saya menjauh
pergi dari tanggungan saya
tanpa sekelumit bersalah
tanpa sedikit resah

ya Allah
ingatkanlah saya
apa yang saya lupa
janganlah Kau hukum saya atas kelemahan saya
jauhkan seksa neraka dari diri saya
sesungguhnya saya hamba yang kerdil
tiada daya upaya melainkan Engkau
tuhan yang menguasai dunia dan isinya

perkenankan ya Allah

# 6

my fav superhero is my parents
coz they are so special

Sunday, February 13, 2011

how beautiful life is

went to ampang hospital two times this week for general surgery ward round
went to surgical ward where there's lot of people are bedridden
cannot walk even some of them cannot talk properly
how lucky we are for being granted a healthy life
a state of well being
which then we misused it by doing so not giving benefit things in our life
just keep on complaining while others are battling to survive
just keep on wasting money while some people need it for medical purposes
just keep on wasting time while for them each and every moment is so precious

life surely unique in it's own way
may Allah grant us a heart that always be grateful for everything that we have
for everything that He gave us

ya Allah...
jadikan kami hamba yang sentiasa bersyukur


# 4

i wish that i can discard my teeth clenching habit
it causes me to have limitation in mouth opening

Saturday, February 12, 2011

Friday, February 11, 2011

ward round??? gotcha!!

this week was our group first and second ward rounds for general surgery
bajet sungguh ayat itu wahai kucingred
the first round was like seriously round in the ward blindly
we just round and searching for the patient
and finally got one
the surgeon was unable to come and we were asked to come again on friday (which is today)
and today
we had our general medicine lectures first in hospital ampang before the ward round session
nothing much to be shared
but seriously
ward round is actually giving us better understanding of concepts and theories that being taught in class
so, enjoy this session before it's too late
poyo jek

tolong... i need teeth for perio simulation
teeth with calculus y'all

rabbi sahhilna

# 2

no-thing~no-think is it

i just name it because there sure is nothing in my blog
and sure i write it usually without thinking
it just for fun
for the expression of my emotions
for something that so called meditation (at least for me la kan..)

i like writing
and here i write
here i am me
but most of the time
here is the place where the other side of me lives

Thursday, February 10, 2011

# 1

am a left-handed
use widely my right hand in clinics (LA, forceps, scaler, handpieces, etc)
teeth clenching during sleeping
like to write
am fussy kot
am lazy
don't like appointment with dentist (it kind of scary)
don't know how to cook
for the time being:
don't like to scale people's teeth
don't prefer denture works
don't like periodontology practical classes
don't like orthodontics wire bending
like oral and maxillo-facial surgery
interest in forensic dentistry
kind of fall in love with endodontics

tu je...

no picture provided sebab my mum tak kasi upload gambar ke internet (except for berkumpulan)

so people, peka k
jangan suka hati je nak post gambar orang kat internet
get the consent first k

lots of LoVe

just for fun...

30 days challenge to post something in blog..

Day 1 - A recent picture of you and 15 interesting facts about yourself
Day 2 - The meaning behind your blog's name
Day 3 - A picture of you and your friends
Day 4 - A habit that you wish you didn't have
Day 5 - A picture of somewhere you've been to
Day 6 - Favorite superhero and why?
Day 7 - A picture of someone/something that has a big impact on you
Day 8 - Short term goals for this month and why
Day 9 - Something you're proud of in the past few days
Day 10 - Songs you listen to when you're happy, sad, bored, hyped, mad
Day 11 - Another picture of you and your friends
Day 12 - How you found out about blog and why you made one
Day 13 - A letter to someone who has hurt you recently
Day 14 - A picture of you and your family
Day 15 - Put your ipod in shuffle. First 10 songs that play
Day 16 - Another picture of yourself
Day 17 - Someone you would want to switch lives with for one day and why?
Day 18 - Plans/dreams/goals you have
Day 19 - Nicknames you have; why do you have them?
Day 20 - Someone you see yourself marrying/being with in future
Day 21 - A picture of something that makes you happy
Day 22 - What makes you different from everyone else?
Day 23 - Something you crave for a lot
Day 24 - A letter for your parents
Day 25 - What would i find in your bag?
Day 26 - What do you think about your friends?
Day 27 - Why are you doing this 30 days challenge?
Day 28 - A picture of you last year and now, how have you changed since then?
Day 29 - In this past month, what have you learned
Day 30 - Who are you?

sesapa yang berminat meh la wat skali ek :)

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

esok first clinical posting to hospital ampang for general surgery

i am so super berdebar

takut la...

camne ni?????

satu lagi

kenapa gigi i like so painful after flossing??

did you guys feel it that way???

it is seriously causing me so unpleasant feeling

can i get my teeth extracted??? *gerammmmm*

rabbi sahhilna

Sunday, February 6, 2011


thumma Alhamdulillah
itu saja yang terlintas di fikiran tatkala tayar bas berhenti di hentian bas bukit jalil
hanya Allah saja yang tahu betapa lega hati dan perasaan kami
perjalanan yang sememangnya menggugat kesabaran
mujur saja bersama teman-teman
kalau keseorangan, mungkin saya sudah berendam air mata
marah, geram, sedih, kecewa, letih
perasaan memang bercampur baur

mungkin selama ini saya terlalu dimanja
hinggakan dengan sedikit dugaan terasa begitu lelah
perjalanan yang panjang
membuka sedikit ruang untuk saya berfikir dan muhasabah
betapa ruginya saya kerana mensia-siakan waktu

terkadang saya rasa jauh
jauh dari rahmatNya

ya Allah
peliharalah hati ini
peliharalah iman saya
hidup dan matikan saya dalam iman
hidup dan matikan saya dalam agamaMu


tolong doakan saya ye... saya keliru...

Friday, February 4, 2011

different angles give different meanings

it's just the way you interpret things

the most important thing is






use your brain

and heart

for better result


Thursday, February 3, 2011

we love holiday

minggu depan kami akan start kuliah general medicine dengan dr baru
berdebar gitu

minggu depan juga kami akan start posting general surgery
agak ngeri di situ ye

semuanya baik-baik sahaja

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

oral pathology oral medicine

the exam was bitter
and i was thinking (when the lecturer starts to distribute the question booklets)
i was like "tak boleh ke belajar je takde exam"
exams are so tiring
but somehow there are some good things about exam
at the very least
you read the books and the notes if not all
you are discussing something beneficial with your friends
you don't waste your time by doing something which are so not giving you benefit at all

but seriously
it way too stress and sometimes
it becoming so unbearable
but that how life goes
need to face it though

i hope
before our third professional exams start
please tell us the result
it somehow help us a lot

looking forward to continue the endodontic treatment with dr
also looking forward to get my periodontal status checked
hopefully, everything are just fine

don't worry kucingred
iAllah everything will be okay

cis ko ni merapu je kucingred...



Tuesday, February 1, 2011

may things become better as time flies

may things become clearer as we go on

may us become wiser as we grow older

rabbi sahhilna

aetiology of periodontal disease

bajet berilmiah sangat je tajuk

masa exam
pakat dok pulun bace notes
and bila rajin tu adalah jugak selak-selak buku teks
(cheh..bajet sungguh ko ni kucingred)
one of the aetiology of periodontal disease is....
stressful live event

so, kita pun wat la observational studies secara tak langsung kat fakulti
terbukti bahawa stressful life event menyumbang tak banyak, sikit in developing periodontal disease
kenapa gitu ek?
according to the notes that i've read
bila someone berhadapan dengan situasi yang stress gitu
taking care of oral hygiene becoming less important
sama la jugak dengan general health
kita tend untuk abaikan sebab ada benda yang lebih penting untuk kita fikir and hadapi

i still remember back in school time
a friend of mine
sampai muntah-muntah pening lalat
sebab tak tidur malam pulun nak study

satu lagi
i do think that exam can increase incidence of dental caries
tak percaya?
meh i bagitahu kenapa
kita-kita ni suka benau stay up dengan coffee la, milo la, tea la
pokoknya minum air manis la
berapa ramai yang minuman ni sangat efektif untuk mengekalkan tahap sedar diri korang masa stay up tu (saya pun tak tahu la kan)
kalau korang jenis yang immune dengan diuretics ni
makanya tertidurlah anda tanpa memberus gigi terlebih dahulu...
jadi, sekian lama
maka adalah early childhood caries (cis, bajet kanak-kanak riang minum ribena je ko ni kucingred)
terbentuklah caries lesion dalam mulut kita (kesian saya sebab sangat susceptible to caries)

dah banyak sangat i merapu pagi ni
nak wat benda lain pulak k


ya Allah permudahkanlah urusan simulation perio harini
semoga kami semua lulus competency test perio